Darci Khan is done with WWE, and she didn’t leave because she got bored.
The former WWE developmental talent, known in the company as Masyn Holiday, opened up in a video posted to Instagram and revealed just how bad things got before she finally walked away. This was not a quick “thanks for the memories” goodbye. Khan said she was miserable, anxious, depressed, and completely lost while working there. Khan told fans that her WWE experience had become mentally unbearable.
“I was very, very, very, very, very, extremely unhappy at that job. My depression and anxiety at an all time high. Lost myself like I would look at myself mirror and didn’t even know who I was anymore. It was that bad. I cried for months straight.”
That is not some vague exit line. Khan said she was crying for months and still stayed because she was scared of what came next. Khan said she had been thinking about quitting for a long time, but the actual moment came out of nowhere. Before practice one day, she said she prayed because she didn’t even feel strong enough to get through the session.
“And what kept me there is me telling myself, you don’t know what you’re gonna do next. Well, what if you leave the job and you’re still depressed and you’re still miserable? Those things kept me where I wasn’t supposed to be for way too long. And literally the day that I left, it felt like the weight of the world was lifted off my shoulders.”
“The day I quit, I did not plan to quit at all. It was all God, I’m telling you. Before I walked in the building, I prayed to God. I wrote in my journal at 1:20pm I said, God, I need you to guide me through this practice. I need you to give me this practice. Because I was on the verge of the whole day. I knew I didn’t have the strength to make it through practice by myself because I just did not want to do that. I did not want to wrestle anymore. It was an unbearable weight that I couldn’t hold myself.”
Once she got to practice, a coach noticed something was wrong right away. Khan said that cracked the door open, and she finally admitted she didn’t want to wrestle anymore.
“Like, I walk into practice, my coach comes up to me and she says, what’s wrong, Mason? And you know when you already finna cry. Yeah, it all just came out. And she’s like, you want to talk about it now? Backtrack. I knew that when I was going to quit that I was going to talk to my coach first. So in that moment, I was like, you know what? Yeah, I want to talk about it. I was like, I don’t want to wrestle anymore.”
Khan said her coach wasn’t shocked either. According to Khan, the coach could already see it on her face every day. That led Khan to head coach Matt Bloom, where she finally pulled the plug.
“And she was like, honestly, I can see it on your face every day. She said, when you show up, it looks like you have to be here, not that you want to be here. And she was like, in this business, like, you have to love it, you have to want it in your heart.”
“And I went and spoke to him and I said, I quit. I can’t do it anymore. My heart is not in it. And I don’t want to waste your time. I don’t want to waste my coach’s time, I don’t want to waste other athletes times. And I, most importantly, I don’t want to waste my time.”
Khan made it clear she is not trying to bury WWE. She thanked the company and the people who helped her, but she also did not hide how badly the job was affecting her. Wrestling is hard enough when someone loves it. For Khan, taking bumps and risking her body every day while knowing her heart wasn’t in it became too much.
Now she is moving on, focusing on teaching, painting, and figuring out what comes next. She may not have left WWE with a big NXT run behind her, but she left with a message that hit harder than any TV debut could have.
Do you think WWE developmental is too intense for NIL recruits who are still figuring out if wrestling is really for them? Let us know what you think in the comments below.
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